Want a successful job search? Be 3-dimensional...

Some say "it is what you know", others say "it is who you know", but my mentor, Barry Forward says it best when he says "it is who knows what you can do".

I am a reluctant networker, I've always been in the "what you know" camp as being the most important thing, to the exclusion of "who you know". But knowing how to do things really well is useless if no one else knows; this is a one-way ticket to being 1-dimensional when you are looking for a job. I've learned that networking is the best way to let people know what you can do.

Sending a resume off to a job posting is not a winning formula anymore. These days you need to beat the bots (ATS) before a human being even sees the resume. Even then, a person, usually not the hiring manager, will scan the resume for 20 seconds to figure out if you even match the criteria of the job.

When at least 118 people apply to each job, your probability of getting an interview (not even the job) according to Workopolis is about 2%. These are not winning odds. This approach is traditional, but it is a 1-dimensional approach to your job search. Look at it from the hiring manager's position, he has a pile of at least 118 relatively undifferentiated candidates that he has to sort through. What is his confidence that any of the people in this large pile can do the job? Hiring managers have buyer's remorse; they are worried that picking the wrong person will set back their credibility in their organization.

Now if someone recommends you to the hiring manager, suddenly you become 2-dimensional. This kind of recommendation will bring your resume to the top of the pile, even if the recommending person does not know you very well.  As long as the recommending person has credibility with the hiring manager, you will become differentiated and rise up above the pile of 1-dimensional candidates. This will increase your chance of being interviewed, but does not necessarily increase the chance of you being hired.

However, when someone with credibility with the hiring manager, who knows you and knows what you can do recommends you for a job, then you become 3-dimensional. This direct knowledge of what you can do will allay the fears of the hiring manager, who will be extremely relieved to get a qualified candidate.

In fact, when a hiring manager finds out about you through someone who knows what you can do, you will probably get the job without it even being posted. In fact, only 30% of jobs ever get posted, 70% of jobs are filled before a public search ever takes place. In particular, the more senior the job the less likely it ever sees a formal job posting.

The key to people finding out about what you can do is through networking. Networking is about letting others know "what you can do", it may not pay off right away, but just as a new business in town must advertise locally -- so must you.

Not everyone believes in networking, there are many people that come from my background who believe that networking is not necessary. Networking with these people won't help you find another job. They will assure you that the best way to find a job is through job boards and recruiters.  I have learned the hard way that most of the quality jobs that I have had were because someone who knew me recommended me to the hiring manager.

However, there is a significant portion of the population that understands the power of networking, and those people can help you to become known. So focus on people who believe in networking, they are eager to meet competent people. When enough people know "what you can do for them", finding a job becomes much easier.

So remember, network with the intention of becoming 3-dimensional...

How We Do Things that We Regret Immediately

Have this ever happened to you?

• Ever become suddenly angry at someone and done things that you regret?
• Ever been aware while a situation was unfolding that you want to behave differently?
• Do you find yourself unable to avoid the same unfortunate situation?
• Found yourself addicted to food, drugs, or sex?

Introducing Miggy and Courtney

How is it possible to lose control of yourself?  How can you find yourself an observer while it seems that someone else has taken control of you?

We talk about the mind as if it is one thing, but the reality is that here are at least two parts to the mind. Just like we use the term car as a single thing doesn't prevent it from being composed of an engine, passenger compartment, trunk, etc.

One of the oldest parts of the brain is the amygdala (Miggy for short); it is responsible for the flight or fight response when we are exposed to danger.  Miggy receives all stimulus (visual, auditory, etc) from the outside world and if it perceives patterns of danger then it goes into fight/flight, otherwise it does nothing.

We used to live in a dangerous world, so Miggy's behaviour is what kept the human race from extinction.  It is a good thing to react to dangerous stimuli and take action to fight or flee.

In a modern world we are not facing dangerous like tigers and lions.  Instead, we react to criticisms, insults, and other things as if they were real dangers. There is plenty of literature on this, so I won't go into it (see 'Amygdala hijack').

Miggy is designed to give you fast answers based on simple pattern recognition. Miggy leads you to make the same decisions when you get the same stimulus:

• You see food that you like and you get hungry
• You see someone attractive and you want to stare at them
• Someone cuts you off with their car and you get angry

The thinking part of your brain that can sort out impressions and come to conclusions is the prefrontal cortex (Courtney).

Survival depends on fast decisions to danger, otherwise, you can be hurt or killed before you have a chance to react (see Dodo).  This is why Courtney is not in control of the bus.  Miggy gets first crack at inputs to the brain because he can can save your life in the presence of danger, however, if he starts executing, then Courtney becomes a passenger along for the ride.

When Miggy decides not to do anything then Courtney gets a crack at what to do next.  Courtney is the part of the mind that can think through situations, look at alternatives. The problem is that Courtney is very, very slow compared to Miggy.

Situations that get you angry or cause you to react and 'lose control' are all situations where Miggy has sprung into action leaving Courtney as a passive observer.  When Miggy is no longer in control, i.e. the threat has passed, Courtney reasserts control and this is when you experience regret.

The worst thing is that Courtney is aware when an automatic reaction by Miggy is taking place. Sometimes you  know how you are going to react, but feel that you are powerless to stop it.

What Does This Mean?

It is important to know how Miggy is programmed in the first place and then what it takes to get bad habits out.

Every time you receive a stimulus the mind dissects the patterns and stores the information.  This is why you never get a chance to make a second impression, there is always some part of the first impression that is stored up.  So any bad first impression will take quite a bit of sustained effort to make it go away.

Every time you react to a situation, especially negatively through anger, Miggy records this.  Every time you have the same angry reaction to the same stimulus you reinforce Miggy and make it that much easier for you to have the exact same reaction when the situation presents itself again.

For example, the first time that you have an angry reaction to a situation there is generally some confusion and Courtney has a crack at preventing you from getting angry.  If you give in to the anger then the impression is registered.  If you give in enough then Miggy will always take over in those situations and you will always get angry.

However, each time you give in to Miggy and become angry it becomes more ingrained.  You will find yourself getting angry faster and faster when presented with stimuli that frustrate you. Frustration leads to anger, anger leads to violence.

Any activity that you repeat often and automatically will get driven into your amygdala.  Each time you do this you give more control to Miggy.

What Can You Do?

The only way to get Courtney back in control is to go through a process of recognizing dangerous stimuli before Miggy takes action and choosing not to take action.  This is really hard.

The reality is that you need to go through the following process:

1. Miggy springs into action and Courtney recognizes it afterwards
2. Courtney is aware that Miggy is acting but can't intervene
3. Courtney becomes aware that Miggy will act but chooses not to stop Miggy
4. Courtney is able to prevent Miggy from acting

Point of No Return

Most people are not even aware that they are ceding control of Courtney to Miggy.  But the more you allow Miggy to take control the harder it gets to take control back.  

The point of no return is where a stimulus causes an automatic reaction where Courtney is not even aware that the action is taking place, such as:

• Something contradictory happens and you get angry immediately
• You see a particular food and you must eat it
• You see an attractive person and then your mind is consumed by them
• You are taking drugs compulsively

Once you hit the point of no return it is virtually impossible for Courtney to reassert control.  Short of hitting rock bottom where you realize the sheer danger of the automatic action, you will have lost control.

After Thought

We all develop behaviours or buttons for automatic behaviour as we get older.  But unless we are vigilant and keep Courtney firmly in control, we will eventually cede control in some situations to Miggy, and will then have to live with the consequences of automatic actions.

Contradictory proverbs: 'Look before you leap' and 'He who hesitates is lost'

Proverbs condense simple principles into a few words.  We are familiar with both of these expressions, but they seem to be saying opposite things.

'Look before you leap', describes people who act before they think things through, and often regret the results of acting hastily.  'He who hesitates is lost', describes people who think too much about things and never end up acting, i.e. analysis paralysis.

Both expressions apply at different times, but how do you know if you are acting too quickly on a decision and when should you think about thinks more?

All decisions that require action have common dimensions:

1. Time available for decision
2. Complexity of the decision

Different decisions have different times available.  When you are driving, you don't have much time to make certain decisions, i.e. if a pedestrian walks out in front of your car.  In general, most decisions are not of this variety.

The complexity of a decision depends on the number of factors involved in the decision and how difficult it is to get the information about those factors.

For example, deciding to purchase a pencil is a very simple decision.  This decision has very few dimensions, for example:

• Mechanical vs regular pencil
• Look of the pencil
• Length of the pencil

There are so few dimensions to this decision and each of the dimensions is well understood, so this decision can be made quickly.  If you make a mistake, you can just get another pencil.  If this kind of decision causes you analysis paralysis, then you are in trouble.

A more complex decision would be buying a car.  Cars come in all shapes and sizes, there are many dimensions to the decision:

• Cost
• New or used
• Number of passengers
• Carrying capacity
• Fuel economy
• Foreign or domestic
• Impact on environment
• Etc

This decision unlike the decision about the pencil is unlikely to be made quickly.  There are many dimensions to consider, which dimensions are the most relevant.  It may be impossible to get everything that you want, so compromises might have to be considered.  Also, if you make the wrong decision then you will be stuck with the decision for a long time.  In this case, look before you leap might be more appropriate.

So you need to know what your personal tendencies are.  If you feel that you need to make quick decisions then you need to take more time when faced with a complex decision.  If you make slow decisions then you need to speed up your process for simple decisions.

Speed / complexity	Simple decision	Complex decision
You decide slowly	Speed up your process	You will be ok here
You decide quickly	You will be ok here	You need to make these slower

Are You are Surrounded by Idiots? Unfortunately, You Might be the Idiot...

Does it feel like you are surrounded by idiots?  How is it possible for so many people to be confident in their abilities and be so incapable?

Every year on  American Idol they show case confident people that can't sing to save their lives that seriously think they can sing. Every wonder how so many people could be deluded about their ability to sing?

On the flip side, some of the best singers on the show clearly lack confidence in their abilities.


A 2009 study¹ shows that the most incompetent people actually believe that they are above average.

People that are ignorant that are unskilled or incompetent tend to be very confident of their abilities.

In fact everyone thinks they are at the 60% level or better, in particular, every person in the bottom 50% think that they are at least at that level, i.e. above average.

So we believe that we are above average sometimes, whether this is true or not.

Interestingly enough people in the top quartile (i.e. the competent ones) think that they are at a lower level than they really are. They believe that other's are more skilled than they really are and so self-evaluate themselves lower.

If you confident that you are above average at something, what if you are really bad at it?

You might assume that observing others would prevent you from having an overblown sense of competence. Shockingly, this is not the case.  When incompetent people observe others, even those better than themselves, they tend to have a higher opinion of themselves.

So even if you are bad at something, you won't figure it out by looking at other people.

The only people who self-evaluate correctly after seeing other people are the competent people, who correctly self-assess that they are better than other people.

Only under one circumstance were incompetent people able to realize their incompetence. When given training on to do things, the bottom quartile revised their opinions of themselves down to about 30%. This was still much higher than their average actual results (12%), but at least they realized that they were below average.

If you really want to know if you are above average at something then you must get training from experts.

In North America, there is a strong belief that we are all intelligent and that training is not necessary. This belief that we don't need to be trained is deadly and consequently it means that there are many pretenders out there.

So be careful before assuming that confidence = competence.

Also, you may want to be careful of any subject which you have not put much effort into but are confident that you are competent.

Odds are there is something that you think that you are good at but it may turn out that you are the idiot!

---

As Mark Twain once said (ironically, of course):

All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.

---

References

¹ Kruger, Justin and Dunning, David. Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments, Psychology, 2009, 1, p.30-46.

Incompetent people hate transparency

When you work with people that are less than competent, it is very hard to get definitive proof that they are doing a poor job.

Remember that most people think they are above average at their jobs (see this).

If  there is definitive proof that they can't do their job then you are dealing with a situation where political will keeps them in power.

That is because people that are less than competent and know that they are incompetent, understand that the primary way that they will keep their jobs is through:

• Making it difficult to measure what they are doing
• Plausible deniability when things are poorly done
• Being friends with people with political power

With  few exceptions, incompetence is simply the result of ignorance.  Effort by the unskilled person together with proper training and mentoring is generally all it takes to become competent.  Some people recognize this and make an effort to become competent.

Competence simply requires effort and training.

Sometimes the lack of proper measurement can have people thinking that they are doing a good job when they are not.  There are many office jobs that are difficult to measure properly and where the primary feedback about your work comes from other people.  This is very dangerous because we all have biases and getting unbiased feedback from a manager or co-worker is next to impossible.

It is difficult to find someone who is incompetent at everything, although I'm sure these people exist.  Rather, what happens is that competent people end up in jobs where they are less than competent, e.g. through promotion and seniority.

Because our desires are essentially infinite, people gravitate towards the highest paying job that they feel that they can hold down.  Unfortunately, that means that people will try to get into jobs that they don't have competence for simply because they want the salary associated wih that job.

We all have  desires and so we seek higher paying jobs.

If someone desires a greater salary than their skill level then they are unlikely to give it up when they discover that they have trouble doing the job.  The only way to keep that job is to make sure that other people can't get definitive feedback that they can't do the job.

When there are unbiased and independent ways to measure the quality of performance then incompetent people are exposed.  The only way for an incompetent person to thrive in an environment is for it to be difficult to measure anything that they do.  If they miss a commitment or work is done in an inadequate fashion then they will have a plausible reason why this is so.

Competent people do not make excuses for poorly done work

Incompetent people do not think of themselves as incompetent.  They feel that they have the same right to things that everyone else does and will often push issues with their performance onto other people.  Another issue is that competent people dislike incompetent people and tend to get very angry.  However, when competent people get angry the incompetent person only sees the anger and not what you are angry about. Being angry with an incompetent person is what enables them to use management and other people's opinions against you.

Exposing Incompetent People

The method of exposing incompetent people is simple, however, it will not apply to every situation.  In particular, do not try to expose an incompetent person if they are politically better connected than you are; all that will happen is that you will lose your job.

You need to be able to do the following:

1. Introduce transparency and unbiased measures
2. Offer training to the incompetent person
3. Don't be angry at the incompetent person
4. Do not talk poorly about the incompetent person

By introducing unbiased measures you enable transparency which then shines a light into what is going on. Unbiased measurement will make it clear in an independent way that that person is unable to do their job.

Offer to train the incompetent person.  You would be surprised how often people have no idea that they are doing a bad job.  Don't assume that they know, show them the results of the unbiased measures and indicate what the problem is.  Ignorant people will generally be surprised and try to do something about it; incompetent people will not.

Don't be angry at the incompetent person -- and this is very important.  When you are angry it affects your entire being and will manifest in all your interactions.  In particular, management will see the conflict between you and the incompetent person as a personality conflict and you will become as much of a problem as the incompetent person.

Do not talk poorly about the incompetent person, not to any one.  This will become office gossip and will also be a one way ticket to being labeled as trouble.  Do not mention this to people that you are friendly with or trust in the office, they probably already know and do not want to hear it.

Conclusion

We have all had to work with people that are less than competent.  Where possible by the introduction of transparency through unbiased measurement and by not getting angry and gossiping you can eventually expose the problem.

The other side of the coin is that you should be aware of your own levels of competence.  If you find that you are less than transparent in many of the things that you are doing then you might need to take a hard look at yourself and then get some training.  We should all be continually looking at ourselves in the mirror and working to improve ourselves.

The Illusion of Control

We like to believe that we are in control of our destiny, but this is only an illusion. The illusion of control exists only when you restrict your attention to the few things that you can influence.

Trying to get control of everything will lead you to lose control, but more importantly, lose time and the ability to appreciate life.

What you control is small compared to what you can't control

You can't control when it rains, you can't control the way other people drive, and you can't control if a downturn in the economy wipes out your company or personal wealth.  As much as you try, you really only influence things -- you do not control them.

We confuse the fact that we can influence a few things with the notion that we can control everything.

For example, we like to believe that we are in control of our bodies, but are we?  People that learn to control some aspect of their bodies (athletes, ballet dancers, martial artists, contortionists) spend about 5 years with full time training to develop that level of control.  B

ut learning precise control of the body does not translate into other kinds of body control, i.e. ballerinas can't break boards and martial artists can't do swan lake.

The average person thinks he controls his body because of restricting attention to day to day activities. Most of our day to day activities do not require much in the way of body control.

The easiest way to see that we don't control our bodies is to expand our vision to include old age.  Old age makes us lose control of different body processes regardless of how much control that you believe that you had in your youth.  It may be different for each person, but we lose sharpness in our vision, clarity in our hearing, and control over our limbs.

We can filter out images of old people with walkers or electric wheel chairs to give ourself the illusion that we are in control, but the reality is that we are not.


You may influence your body, but you do not control it.

People seek control to avoid pain and get what they want.  There is no doubt that through education and skill building you can do this to some extent.  But when the pursuit of control dominates your ability to appreciate the world you can easily lose years of your life without realizing it.

Devoting your energy to getting control of things is likely to cause you to lose control.  Some people like getting directions, but very few people like to be controlled.  Try to control all the people around you and you will lose them.

Seeking to control people is the fastest way to lose them 

Parents who try to control their children will often lose them and wonder what happened.  It only takes one half of a couple to try to control the other person before the relationship becomes doomed to failure.  The irony is that the controlling person will often assume that the relationship failed because they were not controlling enough!

As Stephen Covey suggests, every relationship has a value, just like a bank account.  Do something for the other person and the value of the account goes up.

When you attempt to control other people you are making a withdrawal from that account, and continual attempts to control someone else will bankrupt that account.

Remember, that others can see constant suggestions as a sign that you are trying to control them.  Instead wait for people to ask your opinion rather than just volunteering it all the time.  It does not matter whether you are able to see ways in which other people can improve their lives, worry about your life -- it is up to them to work on theirs.

The way to a happy and productive life is to understand the illusion of control and to move to a position of wanting to influence others but accepting and being happy if that does not happen.

Related Articles

• Positive attitudes won't fix bad relationships
• Just because you believe it doesn't make it true

Discrimination starts with Intolerance

When you find yourself looking at someone else's behavior and saying, "Why are they doing that?" are you being tolerant or intolerant?

If you are simply noticing the event but do not consider it as either good or bad then you may be acting in a tolerant manner.  However, if you are thinking "I can't believe that someone would do that" or "No one should do that" then you are probably being intolerant.

Tolerance is recognizing that everyone has a right to be, believe, or act differently than you do and that your way of being, believing, or acting is no better or worse than theirs.  Intolerance starts when you believe that your way of being, believing, or acting is better than other people.

Intolerance is common, but it is wrong...  

I challenge you to find any situation where intolerance is an acceptable response.  Intolerance is never necessary and is often dangerous, both to you and other people.  Intolerance is often followed by hate and discrimination and you will not find an act of discrimination that does not start with intolerance.

You do have to accept who they are as human beings, whether they are green, blue, or have antlers on their head.  Not accepting someone because of a physical feature that they can not change is not intelligent, it is completely ignorant.

You don't have to accept what other people believe or how they act, but you must tolerate those beliefs or acts. Tolerance is the understanding that everyone is different and has a right to act differently as long as they:

• are not encroaching on anyone
• are doing everything that they commit to do

Living in a homogeneous environment with people that behave and think alike is a breeding ground for intolerance. Anyone in this kind of environment might be able to convince themselves that there is only a few ways to think or behave. Imagine how surprised this kind of individual is when they encounter people that think very differently and act very differently.

 

Tolerance and Productivity

The productivity of an group of people can only be high when there is a high degree of tolerance inside the group. Groups with intolerant individuals fail to achieve their potential and produce much less than other groups.  The intolerant members of the team inevitably give less than 100% because of their beliefs about other team members and either fail to work well or may even sabotage the work of people they dislike.

Intolerance creates distrust and will infiltrate an entire team and destroy productivity.

Tolerance allows people to work well together and find synergies that they never knew existed.  Tolerant
teams are much more flexible and can solve much bigger problems much faster than other teams.  When every member of a team does not feel judged it leaves them open to being much more creative and productive.

Tolerance is the foundation of productive relationships and team productivity

The key to becoming tolerant is to realize that we actually have very little in common with the people around us.  You may have much in common with your best friend, but you will discover that you have many differences as well.  In reality, you only have a fraction of your world in common with anyone else.  This means that learning  that people can believe very different things and by extension act differently than we do.

 We All Believe Very Different Things

Our belief system is like the concentric circles to the left, the inner part of the circle represents our strong beliefs, the outer part of the circle represents our weaker beliefs.  When we interact with another people our beliefs will collide.  You will find that you feel at ease with people with similar core beliefs and less at ease with those with different beliefs.  But if you look, the people with similar core beliefs will believe things that you do not believe in.

Tolerance is recognizing that other people make decisions just like you, they just reason from a different set of beliefs.  Remember, just because you believe something does not make it true, and it does not give you the right to try to change their beliefs.

When beliefs collide and people conflict there is an opportunity for learning and a possibility of destruction. Those that are tolerant will learn and grow from conflict and those that are intolerant will sink into a cycle of destruction.

The only way to have a happy and productive life is to have a high tolerance for people with different beliefs.